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Rituals

The ABCs of Behavior Change (TM) – for habits that stick

 

Let me state for the record that though there is a huge focus on making resolutions, I think the new year is one of the toughest times to adopt a new behavior. Many of us have just come through holidays when schedules were thrown to the wind, indulgences beckoned at every turn, and in the northern hemisphere, the days were dark and cold. There is less energy and momentum for the kinds of changes that people generally like to make which are most often about health and self-improvement.1 On top of that, we just have just come through 2020, the year which seemed to laugh in the face of goal setting.

That said, a recent survey reveals 74% of adult Americans are starting the year off with a resolution (up 15% from the year prior), and a full 55% think they will follow through.2 While 77% of people can make the desired change for a week, research shows only 19% of people can hold onto their changes for two years.3 Not surprisingly, both the percentage of people who make resolutions and the conviction in upholding them both decline with age.4

There are excellent books on the topic of making a habit stick, such as Charles Duhigg’s The Power of Habit which analyzes the process of habit, and more recently, James Clear’s Atomic Habits, with steps for each part of the habit loop. To summarize, you need a trigger that is obvious, a desire to engage in the act, a low barrier to action, and gratification upon completion.

Through coaching hundreds of people wanting to be either more organized or more productive, I noticed challenges in a slightly different way and offer a model to help, The ABCs of Behavior Change™. It offers five progressive steps to bring more commitment to the change you want to make and set you up for success.

Before getting into the techniques of implementing a specific change we must connect deeply with why it matters. If that connection to reason is missing, you might get started on a change due to some external motivation, and this may be enough for some people who fall into Gretchen Rubin’s tendencies driven by others’ expectations (read Gretchen’s book The Four Tendencies for more on this), but it may not enough to make it stick for the long term. Let’s dive in!

 

The ABCs of Behavior Change

A – Acknowledge

Acknowledge and accept the advantage the change will bring you. If you are still doubting, dig deeper to understand how the action will really help you. Do you truly buy into the benefit? What other questions need answering?

 

B – Believe

Believe that you are worth it. Making a change might mean putting yourself first and setting boundaries. For some, this is very uncomfortable. Are you ready to dance in discomfort? Can you give yourself permission to take action?

 

C – Cultivate

Cultivate an environment that encourages and supports you in making the change. This includes your physical environment and the people around you. Do you feel supported? Will you ask for what you need?

 

D – Defend

Defend, with grace, the boundaries you rely on to follow through on the change. Play with and practice respectful language to help others understand your priorities. Become more and more comfortable saying no. How will you play a graceful defense?

 

E – Engage

Engage deeply in the moment you complete the action. Note how you feel physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Let the positive feelings you discover be your intrinsic motivation inspire you to take action again. Will you stop and tune in?

 

Move through each of these steps to build a happy habit – one that you look forward to completing. If for some reason you break the chain, engage in this bonus step.

F – Forgive

Forgive yourself for not sticking to the change you wanted to make, but don’t stop there. Figure out which one of the first five steps wasn’t setting you up for success. Go back to that step, re-examine it, reconnect with it or adjust and move forward.

 

SOURCES

  1. Top New Year resolutions

The data is based on an online survey of 1,790 US adults born between 1928 to 2002 commissioned by Finder and conducted by Pureprofile in September 2020. Participants were paid volunteers.

New Year’s resolution statistics

  1. Percent making resolutions

https://www.finder.com/new-years-resolution-statistics

 

  1. New Year resolution failure rate

Norcross, J C, and D J Vangarelli. “The resolution solution: longitudinal examination of New Year’s change attempts.” Journal of substance abuse vol. 1,2 (1988): 127-34. doi:10.1016/s0899-3289(88)80016-6

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/2980864/

 

 

  1. New Year Resolutions and Conviction by Generation

New Year’s resolution statistics

 

If you’re looking for support in making a change, I offer private and group coaching for individuals and leaders.  I invite you to book a call with me to explore.

Filed Under: Alignment, Awareness, Compass, Intention, Productivity, Rituals, Skills, Systematize Tagged With: behavior change, behaviour change, habit, new year resolution, ritual

Spring Clearing Series – How Oral Care Relates to Productivity, and vice versa

Colgate Total toothpaste, toothbrush
Make time to take care of your whole mouth – a gateway to good health.

I had the pleasure of touring to a few cities in Canada this spring to share ways to be more productive this season. Not only do we need to think about being productive in how we accomplish what we want to do, it pays to find solutions which are as effective and efficient as possible. I gathered a few ideas which provide one-stop shopping or deliver complete solutions for you, and in the next five blog posts, I’ll share the benefits of each one.

In my Productivity model, Productivity CPR™, the P stands for Performance which is all about taking care of the human animal that is you.

According to the Mayo Clinic, your oral health can affect your overall health and among other consequences may contribute to cardiovascular disease and, in pregnancy, may even lead to premature deliveries and low birth weights.

We know that regular flossing and brushing are a necessary part of maintaining good oral hygiene. But there’s more to think about.

 

Staying mindful and paying proper attention when you brush can make a difference to the effectiveness of your efforts and pay back with more comfortable visits to the dentist! Here are a few things to keep in mind:

 

1. Duration

Spend two minutes brushing your teeth. Set a timer if you think you’re not spending enough time. I tend to walk around while I’m brushing my teeth…it makes the time go by in a more interesting way. Or choose a favourite song as a tooth brushing anthem and get your groove on while you’re brushing!

 

2. Coverage

It’s important to brush each side of your teeth with equal attention. I spoke with an endodontist recently who recommended that if you’re right-handed, to pay more attention to how you brush the teeth on the right side of your mouth. And vice versa. Because of ergonomics, you might be naturally giving some areas of your mouth less attention than they deserve. Consider switching hands when you switch the sides of your mouth you’re brushing to always be brushing the opposite side.

 

3. Intensity

Be careful not to brush too hard to avoid abrasion of both the enamel and the gums. 1 Stay conscious of the pressure. This can also be helped by brushing with your non-dominant hand. If you’re using an electric toothbrush, listen to the sound of the motor as it will change with increased pressure. Use the sounds a guide to ensure you’re brushing with a light enough touch.

 

4. Feature-rich Toothpaste

Colgate Total has been around for over 20 years now and recently updated their formula to include even more benefits for your whole mouth – teeth, cheeks, gums and tongue. The new Colgate Total  formula fights bacteria to keep breath fresh, reduces plaque, and fights tarter and gingivitis. It also strengthens enamel, fights cavities, and builds a protective layer over sensitive areas of teeth while delivering stain reduction and prevention.

 

5. Floss

For my entire life, I’ve been an inconsistent flosser.  According to the Canadian Health Measures Survey, I am not alone. Only 28% of Canadians floss at least 5 times a week versus 73% who brush twice a day.2 I remember my dentist trying to motivate me as a teenager, telling me he would take pictures of my teeth if I flossed. I have been blessed with Class 1 occlusion, otherwise known as “perfect bite”, which naturally makes for great pics. Unfortunately, his invitation did not motivate me in the slightest!

For me, the trick to flossing regularly is to keep the floss visible and make it more comfortable to use. Good thing there are new products available which are eco-friendly and pretty on the countertop.

 

6. Portable Picks

I carry a small case of toothpicks with me in my Personal Care Kit to handle the urgent feeling that comes with any morsel of food jammed between my teeth, which proves to be a huge distraction.

 

Sources:

  1. https://www.colgate.com/en-us/oral-health/basics/threats-to-dental-health/tooth-enamel-repair-approaches-0915

 

  1. https://www.canada.ca/en/health-canada/services/healthy-living/reports-publications/oral-health/canadian-health-measures-survey.html

I work with organizations to deliver sustainable performance.  If you know of a forward-thinking company who wants to achieve objectives and help their leaders and teams avoid disengagement and burnout, we should talk.

Book a Discovery Call to learn more about a range of engaging talks and effective coaching.

Filed Under: Fuel, Nurture, Productivity, Products, Rituals, Wellness

Lighten Your Laundry Load!

This is a sponsored post.

Laundry never stops, so if we’re going to have to take care of it I like to encourage ways to make it a lot less onerous.  Read on to find ways you might even find yourself enjoying it!

 

Shift your mindset

As a productivity coach, my mission is to help people have more fun while getting things done, and laundry is no exception. In my holistic model for sustainable performance, Productivity CPR™, the R stands for Ritual. Why ritual? Because I think the word ritual can give a sense of honour to what can often be perceived as mundane.

Whether it be processing receipts or doing laundry, a task that one finds tedious can be elevated with careful thought. Think of your clothing as a tool to help you do what you want to do and to help you make the impression you want to make in the world. Doing laundry then becomes taking care of the clothes that take care of you. This shift in perspective can elevate laundry from a mundane task to an act of love and honour.

Another way to make garment care a more positive endeavour is to think of all the work that went into sourcing, making, shipping and selling the piece so that you can enjoy it. Taking care of it is part of the garment’s life until it can be passed on or recycled.

You may have seen Marie Kondo’s show “Tidying Up”, and observed how she treats spaces, people and things with respect. I noticed this reverence while living in Tokyo for almost three years. We may have different ways of expressing honour, but it’s a truly beautiful way to engage with the world. I grew up witnessing a similar approach in the way my father managed his things. They were well-cared for and treated with love.

 

Photo: Whirlpool® Canada

Fit laundry in virtually anywhere

If space is tight, in a spot only 24” wide, you can install the ventless, Smart All-In-One Washer and Dryer from Whirlpool which as it sounds includes both the washer and the dryer in one machine! I live in a condo and would really love to have both appliances in one machine to free up hanging space for the clothes I choose to air dry. Both the machine and a hanging rack could then be kept in my laundry closet keeping them out of sight rather than lingering in the bathroom. We can’t deny laundry exists – it deserves a good home!

 

Photo: Whirlpool Canada – Load & Go Dispenser™ holds detergent for up to 20 loads

Simplify the process

Not only do you no longer have to worry about switching clothes from the washer to the dryer, the Smart All-In-One Washer and Dryer also saves you time with its super capacity dispenser which holds up to 20 loads worth of laundry detergent. This will make it even easier for anyone in your home to do the laundry.  Without having to manage a heavy detergent bottle, you can now get the kids to pitch in.

 

Smarten the process

To save money on electricity, it can make sense to do laundry when electricity rates are at their lowest. Have you ever thought about that and intended to turn on the machine yet forgotten? With remote access, you no longer have to worry about being home.  Your washer and dryer has just joined the internet of things. The “Smart” in the name of the All-In-One Washer and Dryer means you can access the machine from an app on your phone. You can start a load while waiting for your daughter to hit the ice at hockey practice, or run the dryer when you’ve gone to work and your house guests let you know they are awake.

 

Photo: Neatfreak® – Easy Carry Flex Fabric Laundry Basket-Tote with EVERFRESH® Odor Control

Keep collection easy

Make sure you an easy way to gather laundry anywhere it collects. Bedrooms or a shared bathroom are ideal spots and there are a variety of sizes and shapes to fit any space. A corner unit is fun in a kid’s room if you want to make tossing laundry in the hamper a fun way to get kids involved in the process. Hampers now come in a wide range of finishes as well so you can find something to blend in with your décor. The handles on the hamper shown above make it easier to carry.

 

The Time Timer® helps you have a visual sense of the time available to complete a task.

Make folding more fun

I searched twitter for “laundry” and “stress” and there were so many posts about people sleeping with their laundry instead of folding it, it blew me away. There is a lot of angst out there.  With things we don’t like to do, it is common to overestimate the time it takes. A timer is your friend here.

Step 1 – Run a timer to learn how long it takes to fold a basket of laundry.organization

Step 2 – Keep a Time Timer in your laundry room and now you know roughly how long it takes to fold a basket, see how fast you can get it done and play beat the clock. Gamifying works! Why not include getting all the clothes back in closets and drawers? This is an awesome thing to do with the whole family. It’s never too early to get everyone involved.

 

Give yourself a treat

We know that rewards work, so consider being kinder to yourself when doing the laundry. If you’re like me, in the winter months, your skin is dry. One day, the skin on my fingers was so dry and it kept catching on the inside-out clothes I was turning outside-out (is that a word?), and I decided from that day forward, I would never turn inside-out clothes the right way around again. A little “garbage in, garbage out” theory so my kids would have to solve the problem on their own.

But here’s another option…I’m a big fan of hydration and moisturizing, as where I live you need all the help you can get. I’ve put my best lotions in my gym bag for years to indulge after a workout. Why not have a luxurious salve on hand to use while doing the laundry, especially after any hand-washing, to keep your skin feeling soft and smooth? Made in Canada, from 80% organic ingredients, toxin-free DermaCare Skin Salve from eScential Wellness will make you feel like you’re loving yourself a little bit, too. #loveyourselfhard

I hope this gives you a few ideas on how to make laundry a little lighter in your household!

 

This post was made possible through financial and/or product contributions from Whirlpool Canada, Neatfreak, eScential Wellness and Time Timer.

 

 

Filed Under: Home Organizing, Rituals Tagged With: dryer, folding clothes, hamper, laundry, laundry room, Organized, productivity, timer, washer, washer and dryer

My Simple Four-Step P.L.A.N.™ to Get Organized!

Thinking about getting organized can often be overwhelming. Like any big project, it feels much easier to accomplish and far less daunting if you can break it down into manageable pieces.

Organizing should be looked at from beginning to end. Impulsively we might want to ‘fix’ a space by shopping for an inspiring new piece. Often when bringing back something that looked great in store, whether it be a piece of furniture or a storage piece, we find it simply doesn’t function as it should at home.

Here is my simple four-step P.L.A.N.™ to get organized which looks at the process from beginning to end to help make sure the energy you invest will pay off. Consider enlisting help if you find yourself stuck in one area and unable to move forward.

PRIORITIZE

Identify the purpose of the space – both what you want to do and how you want to feel. Aim for five or fewer activities. Find words to describe the atmosphere of the room – serene, energetic, calm, homey, minimal, lived-in. Articulating your vision is important for it is your guide through the other parts of the organizing process. If you don’t start here, you are not clear about what you’re aiming for.

The challenges here include deciding between competing priorities and, if you live with others, competing styles. Often, it is an over-looked discussion but it is also helpful to make sure everyone is on board in creating and sustaining an environment in which you can all thrive.

LIBERATE

Once you have your vision, you will want to let go of items that don’t support it. When you let go of possessions you liberate both your space and your mind.

The process of liberating includes

  • Sorting: to know what you have
  • Editing: to identify what to keep
  • Divesting: to remove items that don’t belong

For many, this is often the hardest part of getting organized. There are many reasons we hang onto things. None of us are immune! I sometimes have conversations with myself to let things go. (I still have ceramic beer steins from my high school and universities.)

ARRANGE

For each activity, create a zone to house furniture and storage related to it. Place items in your space so that they are comfortable to access and are well-preserved. This means paying attention to the nature of:

  • The space: such as size, shape and architectural features
  • The item: such as size, weight, fragility, perishability
  • Your preferences: such as fold vs. hang, pluck vs. rummage, hanger vs. hook

Challenges include moving to the Arrange stage too early in the process. If you’ve ever had bins and baskets that don’t work, this may be why. Also, it is important to remain self-aware when shopping. The lure of fashionable form may be regretted if function has been overlooked.

NURTURE

Creating order is one thing. Maintaining it is another. We all have different tolerance levels for chaos, so it is important to develop habits that suit you. This may mean cleaning your desk at the end of every day, or clear the clothes off the chair in your room every three days.

The challenges here is the belief that once set up, a system should work forever with no effort. This is not true. Systems should be designed to work with you, so if you have been thorough and honest in assessing your preferences, you’re more likely to achieve quick success. It’s also easy to forget to devote time to restoring order.

If you find things getting out of hand, or if you experience a life transition, it’s a good time to revisit the P.L.A.N.™


PRODUCTIVITY TRUTH: Vision is your guide through the organizing process. Start here to achieve your goal.

Filed Under: Skills

Signs of Disorganization at Work

In a 2011 study commissioned by Professional Organizers in Canada, 7 in 10 Canadians who work say their workplace is disorganized and report feelings of stress, frustration and failure. Disorganization not only affects the individual’s work, it affects others – both colleagues and customers. Added up, there is a significant cost to being disorganized.

Signs of Disorganization at Work

A messy desk may be the most obvious sign of disorganization; it is however, not the only indication. Keep a lookout for:

  1. Time lost searching for misplaced items for information.
  2. Being late for or missing appointments.
  3. Missing work deliverables or submitting incomplete or unprofessional work.
  4. Not spending time on the most important tasks.
  5. Missing work due to stress or preventable workplace injuries.

The impact of a disorganized approach to work includes:

  1. Lower overall productivity and/or working longer hours.
  2. Lack of credibility.
  3. Job dissatisfaction and other negative feelings.
  4. Lack of career growth.
  5. Absenteeism.

Getting organized is not about moving from procrastination to perfection. It is about being the most productive person you can be. A sense of achievement is indeed what drives many of us. There is research to suggest happy people are more productive people. I suggest the reverse is also true – productive people are more satisfied people. Now, what will you spend all that extra time on?


TRUTHBOMB: Getting organized is not about moving from procrastination to perfection. It is about being the most productive person you can be.

Filed Under: Skills

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Visit the CoreChair website to order. 

In Canada: https://ca.corechair.com/
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Nitehood

Visit www.nitehood.com and to get 15% off, enter code SLEEPWELL

Book a discovery call with Clare? Click here to contact me.

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Productivity catalyst, highly sensitive executive coach, and speaker, Clare Kumar cultivates sustainable performance in busy professionals so they can keep making rich contributions in all areas of life and achieve greater fulfillment.

She inspires leaders, professionals, employees and entrepreneurs to respect humanity and boost performance through marrying productivity and pleasure. After all, why shouldn’t you have fun while getting things done?

 

From the Blog

Highly Sensitive Patient Care – How much information do you want to share?

The SEED Model™ of High Sensitivity

LG Home Office Makeover Contest

how do you build connection with a dispersed workf how do you build connection with a dispersed workforce?
that’s exactly what Sally Page, co-founder of @work.tripp and I explore in the latest episode of the Happy Space Podcast.

“there is something very beautiful that happens when a team comes together in terms of their motivation and their kind of performance, when they really come together with purpose…but it’s really hard to do”

and i think it’s important to recognize that simply being together in an office, does not connection make. Dr. Vivek Murthy, when he was the 19th Surgeon General in the US, called out loneliness as an epidemic - before the pandemic. 

Sally recommends:

🧠intentionally crafting connection by building experiences, especially out of the office.

📅choosing a cadence depending on the growth stage of the team or project. quarterly is often ideal.

🎯 focusing on one key thing during the offsite. connection itself can be the goal.

🌳getting out into nature. many studies reveal the benefits and a change of scenery is more memorable.

what are you noticing about building connection at work?

🔗to podcast in bio

#connection #teambuilding #leadership #startup #worktripp #HSP #HappySpacePodcast #happyspacepod #coach
"stay away from the extroverts" said, Tom Peters w "stay away from the extroverts" said, Tom Peters
wait, what? this extrovert had a moment in our podcast interview.

read on to find out what happened in our conversation and why now, Tom says, “look for the quiet and sensitive”!

when I read "Tom Peters' Compact Guide to Excellence", my jaw dropped when he proclaimed that Susan Cain's book "Quiet" is the best business book of this century. the book opened Tom's eyes to the value of quiet, introverted people which had been completely missing from his and many organization's thinking.

in our conversation, when Tom suggested we "stay away from extroverts", being extroverted myself, i was compelled to lobby for sensitive extroverts and offer a counter-thought:

what if it isn't introversion and "quiet" that we need to value?

(i have rarely been accused of being too quiet, despite my middle name meaning "peace" - nice try, mum and dad!)

what if it is sensitivity?

highly sensitive people are superb noticers, process information more deeply, and are adept at synthesizing information. they also innately bring the much-needed empathy required in today’s challenging work world. the 30% of sensitive people who are extroverts (6% of the general population) are a special asset to any organization.

that said, HSPs also need more time to rest and recover during the work day. without that, we are at risk of burning out.

Tom reflects, "I said to somebody, I'm so sensitive to what's going on that I'm always overloading."

Tom immediately revised his "linguistic expression" to say, "look for the quiet and sensitive". I guess I ought to still work on being a bit quieter. ☺

have a listen as Tom and I explore what he calls “extreme humanism”. if we can create work experiences that respect humanity, imagine what we can accomplish.

we can definitely use more Tom Peters-like people in the world.

i'd love to hear what you think. please comment below or on your fave podcast platform.

🔗 link in bio

#hsp #hspcoach #clarekumar #highlysensitiveperson #inclusivity #empathy #sensitivity #leadership #extremehumanism #humanity #productivity
Instagram post 18351377770059912 Instagram post 18351377770059912
Tom Peters is intellectually irritated! he has bee Tom Peters is intellectually irritated! he has been fighting for extreme humanism for 45 years. 

“the message is clear. the message is simple. the message is powerful..."

future of work champions - what can we do to help Tom out? 
comment below!

🔗 in bio for full episode

#futureofwork #humanism #insearchofexcellence
Tom Peters has been revered in the world of busine Tom Peters has been revered in the world of business management ever since releasing the 1982 book In Search of Excellence with co-author Robert Waterman. selling shy of 5 million copies, it is recognized as one of the most influential management works.

in our conversation, we explore Tom’s deep respect for humanity which he refers to as Extreme Humanism. we dive into sensitivity, his fondness for “quiet” people, inclusivity, and the power of female leaders. we tackle the challenges of managing by zooming around and the need for a new kind of leader. 

while some understand a different leadership mindset is required for the current world of work, many don’t. we are, indeed, still in search of excellence.

🔗 to podcast🎙 in bio

#hsp #hspcoach #clarekumar #highlysensitiveperson #inclusivity #empathy #sensitivity #leadership #extremehumanism #humanity
if you want a 4-day week or are curious about impl if you want a 4-day week or are curious about implementing one, you’ll want to join Joe O’Connor an i as we unpack the in-demand 4-day week. 

Mon Mar 13 - noon - 1 pm EDT

the largest trial of the concept wrapped up recently in the UK and Joe was intimately involved. get the inside scoop and your questions answered. 

you’ll also have a chance to win a Sensory Matrix Assessment (you have to stay till the end!)

register via HappySpaceHotTopics.com

#flexibility #4dayweek #worklifeintegration
ooh, it was refreshing to feel spring in the air a ooh, it was refreshing to feel spring in the air at the
@homedepotcanada spring showcase.

from smart lighting, to durable and stylish outdoor furniture (metal that really looks like wood), to new storage solutions from @ryobi_canada 

chatting with the knowledgeable buyers and product specialists to learn what’s new and share some ideas was a highlight. as was seeing media friends. so good to see you IRL!

#FromDoToDone
“the number one thing you do if you want to impr “the number one thing you do if you want to improve performance is promote more women,” says Tom.

the corporate world can often be hard to navigate as a woman. inviting the compassion, understanding, and advocacy of our allies is what we need to design inclusive performance for all.

let’s keep our voices strong throughout the year.

this clip is from the upcoming episode of the Happy Space Podcast, "Still in Search of Excellence" with Tom Peters, dropping march 13th, 2023.

join Tom and me as we explore leadership as influenced by the pandemic, tensions between leaders and the workforce, and how to manage by Zooming around. we also find out why is Tom Peters "intellectually irritated"?

tune in on march 13th on your podcast player of choice, Youtube or www.clarekumar/podcast.

and if you're free, join us on monday at noon EDT for the Happy Space Hot Topics conversation unpacking the 4-day week with special guest Joe O'Connor, former CEO of 4-Day Week.

register via http://www.happyspacehottopics.com/ and be entered to win a prize. (you must be in attendance to win!)

#ALLin #inclusivity #women #leadership
a few hours drive east along the lake and happy to a few hours drive east along the lake and happy to be meeting my clients in Kingston. 

you’ll hear me talking a lot about remote work but sometimes it really is worth travelling to be in person. 

i encourage leaders to be intentional about why they bring people together in person. mix task and team, content and connection, function and fun and there is a greater chance employees will want to participate. 

#acknowledgetheask and make it worthwhile to show up. 

budget for the travel time, energy and expense required. recognize you’re making a withdrawal on personal time. 

design for well-being and performance will flow…
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