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How to Work with Highly Sensitive People

meerkat on alert representing high sensitvity

You might have heard the term HSP and wondered if it applies to you or some of your coworkers, or perhaps even your partner. Understanding this trait will be helpful to you in any case as it may help you advocate for yourself, navigate your relationships more effectively, and to better support others.

WHAT IS AN HSP?

Dr. Elaine Aron was in conversation with her therapist when they suggested that perhaps she was highly sensitive.1 The idea of being highly sensitive intrigued Elaine so much she went on to research and in the early 90s defined the trait that is also known clinically as Sensory Processing Sensitivity.

 

It is important to note it is quite distinct from Sensory Processing Disorder which includes difficulties in organizing and responding to information that arrives through the senses and which can have a significant impact on learning and daily life.

 

People who have the trait are most often referred to as HSPs, with HSP standing for “highly sensitive person”. Elaine defines the term as “a preference to process information more deeply”. I would add the word “involuntary” in advance of preference, as there is little to no choice involved. The trait is present in about 20% of the population, so I can guarantee you know someone who is an HSP…even if they don’t know it yet. HSPs’ brains light up differently in fMRI studies compared to non-HSPs when given tasks that involve perception involving subtle differences.

 

Let’s tackle the word “sensitive” as it can put some people off. Sensitivity is an under-valued quality in North American culture and, despite its great value, can be perceived by some as a sign of weakness. Here, sensitivity does not relate only to emotional sensitivity and easily finding oneself in tears, though that is possible for some. In fact, Elaine confesses she would rename the trait if she could start over, perhaps replacing sensitive with the word perceptive or responsive. Our sensitivity or responsiveness extends to the physical, mental and emotional.

 

Since the term is out in the world, I’m going with it so those who have learned about it can find the Happy Space Pod and podcast, but it’s worth understanding the trait includes some other qualities. Elaine refers to them with the acronym DOES (pronounced like the verb, not the noun, though I think the image of female deer is probably apt).

 

HSP QUALITIES

 

D – Depth of Processing – we spend more time dealing with new information and thinking about it more deeply… which can definitely be exhausting. The dark side is tendency to overthink.

 

O – Overstimulation – we can be extremely sensitive to high stimulation environments – think crowds, busy roads, and noisy restaurants, as well as rough fabrics!

 

E – Empathy & Emotional Reactivity – we have greater reactions to both positive and negative experiences with mirror neurons activating in response to pictures conveying emotion, even in people we don’t know. Further, our brains are noticeably more responsive to positive stimuli.

 

S – Sensitivity to subtle stimuli – we pay attention to everything. Couple that with our empathy and you’ll find us looking out for others.

 

WHAT HSPs NEED AND WHAT YOU CAN DO TO PROVIDE SUPPORT

  1. We need time to process thoughts. From you, we appreciate patience while we form our ideas and actions.
  2. We are sometimes over-stimulated. From you, we appreciate empathy and compassion. Compassion in the form of supportive action to eliminate a stressor is even better.
  3. We deeply feel the emotional energy of others. From you, we appreciate the flexibility to take quiet time and be in a space where we can center, rest, and recover.
  4. We notice small things which may be of great importance. From you, we appreciate being heard. Customer service departments – we are your greatest gift if you are willing to listen.

 

HSPs are shown to make exceptionally good employees with high performance reviews, yet if conditions are not kind, we will be the first to burnout.

 

If you are an HSP – define what you need to sustain your energy. I call these Productivity Table Stakes™ – eight key ingredients to understand your relationship with and ensure are considered every day.

If you are a leader, ask your HSP employee what they need to succeed. It’s my favorite leadership question for everyone, but it is so relevant here.

If you are a partner to an HSP – co-create your home and life together to minimize stress and increase the joy in your time together.

 

I invite you all to join the Happy Space Pod – a safe online community to explore greater productivity and well-being for highly sensitive professionals. I hope to see you there.

Filed Under: HSP - Highly Sensitive Person, Leadership, Performance, Relationships, Wellness Tagged With: colleague, highly sensitive person, hsp, interpersonal skills, productivity, work

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Productivity catalyst, highly sensitive executive coach, and speaker, Clare Kumar cultivates sustainable performance in busy professionals so they can keep making rich contributions in all areas of life and achieve greater fulfillment.

She inspires leaders, professionals, employees and entrepreneurs to respect humanity and boost performance through marrying productivity and pleasure. After all, why shouldn’t you have fun while getting things done?

 

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doing my best to navigate obscene noise from the construction below. a “multi-hundred thousand dollar” renovation joining two units together. 

tied to good ergonomics and two screens for the work i had to complete this afternoon, i have learned my bose quiet comfort headphones are no match for concrete cutting. 

just as silence once again returned here is when i learned elliot peed on the guest bed. luckily, i anticipated this and the bed was covered in a plastic sheet. phew! 

just got back from dropping my Love at work after he got a flat tire on the way. 

all this, and i am sticking to my all-healthy food and drink plan for the next six weeks. 

but know i am imagining the biggest bag of sour cream and onion potato chips right now. and i’m not sharing. 

#toughday #noise #stress #neighbours #concrete #demolition #selfcompassion
I remember reading that 70% of HSPs are introverts I remember reading that 70% of HSPs are introverts and 30% are extroverts and thinking, "except for me and other ambiverts".

Well, along comes HSP-Extrovert
@hspextrovertjennt to shake up my world.

She claims that are in fact no ambiverts.
Wait, what?

Yep. In our conversation, Jenn helps me understand how she came to this conclusion.

Tune in and let me know if it makes sense to you, too?

And drop below...which one are you?

🔗 in bio.

#hsp #podcast #introvert #extrovert #ambivert #highlysensitiveperson
i had to drive around a little today and what a tr i had to drive around a little today and what a treat. blossoms are in full force. catch them while you can. 

magnolia stop me in my tracks. 

what’s your fave blossom?

#spring #blossom #magnolia #littlebigthings
you know i will always love talking about closets! you know i will always love talking about closets! tune in as @restore_order_now Naemah and I talk the latest closet know-how. 

Posted @withregram • @napo_natl Closet Design Magic - The latest episode of the NAPO Stand Out Podcast featuring Host @clarekumar and guest @restore_order_now Naeemah Ford Goldson; Founder of The National Association of Black Professional Organizers (NABPO). Download and listen today at NAPOpodcast.com, our YouTube channel, Apple Podcasts, Spotify and more!

#closet #closetdesign #organize #organizer #podcast
I made so many mistakes. Mistakes I realized later I made so many mistakes. Mistakes I realized later that parts of me knew were going to be so. 

I dismissed numerous signs and kept my brain in charge. Poor relationships - both business and personal ensued. 

Now, I do my best to TUNE IN to my intuition. 

Intuition expert Sunil Godse @intuitivebranding101 helped further expand my thinking around the topic and shared illuminating examples of others who have come to believe in its power. 

As a highly sensitive person who can tend to overthink, committing to being still and listening has helped immensely.

Tell me, do you listen to your intuition?

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Fellow coaches, join @christoffelsniejders & me as Fellow coaches, join @christoffelsniejders & me as we make connections between elements of the Highly Sensitive personality and the new science of 3 Brains (Head, Heart, and Gut) Theory to give you powerful insights into the way one can coach and support leaders. 

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meet my mum. sensitive, thoughtful, does the bes meet my mum. 

sensitive, thoughtful, does the best she can

taught me to create a home and inspired me to do something of value

she made being sick as a kid feel extra special

also ate copious numbers of mars bars while pregnant making me a substantial baby!

wishes for joy on this mother’s day if you’re celebrating, hugs if you’re unable to because of loss or because the day just doesn’t fit your life. 

🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸🌺
Let’s talk THRIVE CIRCLES! Small groups. Meanin Let’s talk THRIVE CIRCLES!
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Celebration.

It’s time. 

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#hsp #happyspacemovement #advocacy #allyship
#groupcoaching
cherry blossom beauties. an annual tradition (exce cherry blossom beauties. an annual tradition (except for 2020). ever beautiful. some trees in ful bloom, others just ready to unfurl. mother’s day weekend will be special. they are definitely later this year. enjoy!’🌸🌸🌸
#cherryblossom #ohanami
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Is it just me or am I an HSP?

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%%QUESTIONANSWERS%%
Just give me my score
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Where can we email you your score, the HSP traits, and how they show up for you.
 
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Note - you are not being added to a marketing list when you choose this option.

You got a score of %%YOURSCORE%% out of %%TOTALSCORE%%
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You're blessed with superb filters and have no trouble handling a chaotic environment. Not a lot bothers you. HSPs dream of feeling like this!


You believe “done is better than perfect”. With your focused action, there’s a chance you can be perceived as being a bit of a bull in a china shop. You may quickly jump to conclusions and be too casual with others’ feelings. 

 

You may benefit from taking more time to assess a situation before taking action, something that comes naturally to HSPs.

 

Engaging with HSPs may invite you to notice nuances in a situation that can help smooth your journey.

 

With about 20% of people being highly sensitive, it makes good sense to learn more about the trait.

 

You’re invited to join the Happy Space Pod Online Community, a positive place for HSPs and also for non-HSPs like you who want to better understand and more fully support the valuable HSPs in their lives. 



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You notice a mix of emotions each day, in yourself and others. Sometimes this is easy to accommodate. Other times, it can be overwhelming.

 

You are sometimes bothered by disorganization and chaos around you and notice what could be improved. 

 

Other times, you miss nuance and subtleties that can better guide your actions. You can be creative in the right environment.

 

You are sometimes able to reprioritize efficiently when necessary. Other times, you might find yourself needing to think deeply before making a decision.

 

With 1 in 5 people having the trait of high sensitivity, it is quite possible that you are one of them. 

 

If you shared your email address with us, you should have already received an email with your custom results and more detailed information.

Meanwhile, I invite you to explore the trait of high sensitivity by joining the Happy Space Pod Online Community, a positive place for HSPs and also for non-HSPs who want to better understand and more fully support the valuable HSPs in their lives. 

I hope to see you there.


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Hello, fellow HSP!


You believe perfect is worth striving for and you are proud of your conscientiousness. Being so thoughtful with your work often leaves you frustrated at just how long it takes to get something done. 


Your ability to notice what’s going on around you provides helpful cues which guide your path forward. While blurting out what’s on your mind has sometimes ruffled feathers, you are generally perceived as a thoughtful team player who cares for others. 


You will benefit greatly from setting boundaries, improving self-regulation,  and self-advocating to preserve your energy. 

Join the supportive Happy Space Pod Online Community for more strategies that will help you thrive as an HSP.


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